Improve Your Money & Marriage Communication

Successful marriages require good communication. The kind of communication you had when you were dating… close-up, honest, often, and generous. Remember, that’s when you realized how much you liked it when she wrinkled her nose as she laughed, and she was able to ignore your receding hairline.

When it comes to money and marriage, God wants married couples to use money – even challenges with money – to come closer together, not have it damage the relationship. They should think of money as glue to their marriage and not as a wedge that separates. And that requires good communication. To improve your communication, answer these questions together.

How would you rate your communication skills and what can you do to improve? 

This is the reason we recommend that couples have a weekly money date to pray together and invite the Lord to be part of their financial life, review their income and spending for the week and celebrate when they make progress in their finances. If you establish a time to talk about money, you’ll improve communication.

Do you encourage your spouse and celebrate financial victories? 

This can change your marriage, because when most couples talk about money – there’s a problem. Someone is spending too much or not earning enough. This is why you have to be intentional to celebrate progress. Become your spouse’s number one cheerleader, and it will have a massive impact on the health of your marriage.

What are the biggest differences between you and your spouse? 

It’s guaranteed that there are going to be differences. As the late Larry Burkett used to say, “If the two of you were the same, one of you would be unnecessary.”  One is probably a spender and the other a saver. One is probably more gifted in keeping the budget.  We should celebrate the differences… and the strengths of your spouse can offset your weaknesses.

Have you agreed upon long-term goals? 

This is super important, because when you both know your most important goals and dreams, you’ll spend money on those things that will help you achieve the goals, instead of falling prey to impulse spending.

Warmly in Christ,

Howard Dayton

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Howard Dayton graduated from Cornell University and served two and a half years as a naval officer. After developing a railroad-themed restaurant in Orlando, Florida, Howard began his commercial real estate development career in 1972, specializing in office development. 

After a business partner challenged him to study the Bible to discover what God teaches about handling money, Howard’s life was profoundly changed. The Lord gave him a passion to share these life-changing principles, resulting in the authorship of five books, Your Money Counts, Free and Clear, Your Money Map, Money and Marriage God’s Way, and Business God’s Way. He also has authored six small group studies, including Charting Your Legacy. 

Howard founded Crown Ministries in 1985, which merged with Larry Burkett’s ministry in 2000 to form Crown Financial Ministries. During his tenure as CEO, Crown taught more than 50 million people in 88 countries. Howard transitioned from Crown, and in 2009, founded Compass Financial Ministry. Compass currently serves in 85 countries. Since beginning in ministry, he has served as a full-time volunteer. 

Howard married Beverly in 1971, and they have two children and four grandchildren. Beverly went Home to be with the Lord after a courageous five-year journey fighting breast and bone cancer. Howard married Lynn in 2019. They reside in Central Florida and Charleston, South Carolina. He has led more than 75 financial small groups. 

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